Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Safety Net

I had an interesting conversation with a friend the other day, and I'm going to throw this idea out to others to comment. Dating Awkwardness, it's happened to all of us. That first date, we're not quite sure what to say, what to do. Maybe the 2nd and 3rd dates are a little easier, but that awkwardness of how to act or what's expected or what are we really feeling, is still there for a little while. My friend and I came to the conclusion that this dating awkwardness might be an innate safety net. What would we do if we started dating someone(I'm assuming there is physical attraction and an initial interest in a person before this first date) and immediately hit it off, we'd stick with them. And that works for some people! For some that is how it starts. But for some of us, if that situation occurred, we might just jump at the first guy or girl that came along. I sometimes think that awkwardness is there to keep us from getting involved with someone, too fast. I'm not necessarily saying this from personal experience, just observance. Now, while I'm not a proponent of really LONG dating relationships(come on, we're not going to every find out EVERYTHING about a person before marriage, or even during marriage) I do agree that we should be working towards learning who a person is before joining the big dance. So my theory, awkwardness between men and women in a dating sense, is there for a reason. Thoughts? (I usually don't post these relationship centered blogs, mainly because I usually don't have much to say! But this theory intrigued me yesterday and I saw another's blog which concisely graphed out the relationship between men and women which was interesting, and I don't want to bore readers with what is really on my mind...e-contracts, discharging of duties, consideration...blah, blah business law stuff. I do have that midterm next week though. AAAHHH!)


Shelley & Steve said...

I dunno... I think sometimes the awkwardness is there because we aren't confident. Or maybe because the person you are on a date with is socially awkward (don't tell me that's never happened!). Or maybe because we have too many expectations for a first date (it is just a date after all and can mean absolutely nothing and that's ok). It could be a safety net I suppose but obviously it isn't supposed to be there when you are dating someone. So maybe its more of a speed bump.
Personal note: I don't remember any awkwardness when Steve and I had our first date. But I think we were both confident and comfortable with ourselves and didn't go into the date with any expectations.